Chelsea Day School
Written by: Diana Wirzburger - 2's Head Teacher
When your child enters the doors of their new school on the first day, it can be an exciting time when they’ll meet new friends, establish new schedules, and hopefully find themselves immersed in the discovery of new learning experiences.
This considerable shift in daily schedule can cause your child to feel some very normal preschool separation anxiety, alongside you! When a child comes to school for the first time, the whole family makes that transition with them.
Please find below an excerpt on separation, written by one of our Two’s Teachers, Diana Wirzbuger. This is an excellent snapshot of our separation process and valuable insight for any parents of incoming two year old preschool children.
We are here to remind you that the resiliency of children never ceases to amaze. We will work together for a fun and meaningful transition to preschool. Here are some time-tested suggestions:
Teacher Diana and Teacher Helen have recorded stories which are available on the Parent Portal. Many of these books will be available on our classroom bookshelf. Let us know which book your child connect with us and we will make sure we have it closeby!
Our The Beginning of the Year book can help you to show your children the classmates, teachers and administrators that they will see on their first days of school. We used a a few answers from your family questionnaires to create connections and start conversation. For instance, many children like to play with Magna Tiles, baby dolls and dinosaurs. A PDF will be sent and a hard copy will be going home the first week of school.
You can also stay connected by reading our recaps. This helps parents to stay involved and mainly helps to facilitate conversation. “How was school?” is so broad for a 2 year old. Pictures can provoke open-ended questions like “How did the play dough feel in your hand?” or “Where were you and Jane running to?” It can be helpful to look at the blog posts even on days when your child did not go to school. The same materials and provocations are set out for several days in a row (more on that later!) so it can be a good preview of the day to come.
Soothe your own nerves first! Children are naturally empathetic and pick up on our emotional cues. When grown-ups seem emotionally heightened, children will too. Please remember to take care of yourself this weekend. Relax, have a nice cup of tea and remind yourself that we are here for all of you.
As Jean (our director) mentions, create a special connection or routine. Place a heart in their pocket or kiss their hand. Come up with a special thing that is just for you to remind them that you are always with them.
Again, be sure to arrive just on time. We understand being nervous about trains or other delays and not wanting to be late. If you are a bit early, do not wait in the alley. It isn’t a very inviting space and children get worked up waiting there. Take a walk around the block, get a muffin, etc.
Decide this weekend how you will say goodbye and try your hardest to stick with the plan. When your child is crying and seems distressed, it is very easy to waver and linger in hopes that they will calm themselves and enter school with a smile. This is a rarity. More often than not, the longer a “goodbye” takes, the harder it gets because children see hope that it will not happen. And the longer a child is distressed, the longer it takes to soothe them after. A quick, loving goodbye and “See you soon!” is the best course of action.
We hope you are having fun decorating your Family Books! These are so fun to look at with the children one on-one or in small groups. It’s the first tool we reach for when a a child is missing their grownups.
If a child really needs one, it is okay to bring a “lovey” or small stuffed animal. Sometimes these can be a big help in the transition, but other times they can hinder progress if they become too much of a distraction or challenge (ex. “Lovey has to stay in the classroom during bathroom breaks and roof time”). We can address that individually as time passes.
If you can, please stick closeby for the first day or two. It is rare that a child cannot be consoled enough to stay the full class session, but it does happen. There is a balance between having confidence that the child will work through this very difficult moment and not having school associated with distress. We are very good at making that call. If you don’t hear from us, assume that all is well. We are more than happy to answer any questions over email later, but in the middle of it, we need to be focused on the children in front of us.
One of the reasons that we love working with these very young ones is the joy that comes with watching their confidence grow when they can say goodbye and bounce right into the classroom. This may be a very hard week or two for everyone’s emotions, but we are a team and will get through the process together!